Winter colds.

At this time every year the entire population of the UK seems to be annihilated - or should we say violated - by a bombardment of vile lurgy.

Everyone has it. Old grannies on the bus are sneezing into their embroidered hankies, little kids are wiping their snot in places they really shouldn't (adults doing pretty much the same) and a cacophony of coughing is echoing throughout the streets of London like the sound of an impending WW3 attack.

But the issue here is that it isn't deemed acceptable for people to take time off work to get better. As a consumerist culture we are bombarded by quick-fix treatments and magic pills from which we are expected to recover from our fluey woes quicker than you can say 'Gesundheit'.

The amazingly ill-informed marketeers seem to believe that their products posses super powers and that will allow one to bounce back into usual workaholic form within a couple of hours. Impossible. The result being that we, the workers, are unable to take guilt-free time off work.

So the moral of the story? Ignore the slogans and the lies - call in sick and take time off work watching telly in bed until you're fully recovered.